09 22 11 Can You Feel It?

Can you feel it? Wait for it, just a few more, ahhhhh, there it is.

Can you smell it? You have to be able to smell it at least? Yup, that’s it. It’s in the air. That sharp, crisp feeling. That cool crisp smell. That reminder that we are soon going to be freezing our butts off.

Yes, that’s it! I knew you knew what I was talking about.

I always thought that the twenty-first was the first day of fall, but my sister in Florida tells me that it is the twenty-second. Now I am all confused. How would she know anyway? Do they even have a fall in Florida? Isn’t it like, umm, summer, three hundred and sixty four days a year down there? Please, give me a break sis. Smile.  Either way, it is fall, and we are on our way up around the final bend. The final turn.

I remember when I was a youngstah, the trees on my road would turn colors in unison. The trees on the start of my road would turn first, and they would follow suit until the end trees would turn last. How does Mother Nature do things like that? Is she psychic? Does she know something that we do not?

Fall is another season that seems to have its own characteristics that are unmistakably hers and hers alone. We have already had a couple mornings here in the low thirties, and that was last week when it was still summer.

I am still hanging on though. I still have shorts on today. I am on fall strike! Picket line and all. I just can’t let go of summer yet. It is still engraved in my non-migrational mush melon.

I can see myself gradually sliding into fall mode, and I predict that it will fully engulf me, sometime around December twenty-first. Just in time to deny the arrival of winter. How convenient.

Fall does hold with it some special times though. I used to run all over the country side here in central Maine, and the fall foliage was just spectacular. I would get to see the differences in the change in relation with different areas of the state. The mountains would show off their fall fury, and then a month later, the coast. It really was a never ending months worth of brilliance. I can still see the oranges, and the reds and yellows a little. Not so much the greens and browns though.

The colors of fall will live inside of me for all time. I am sure I am not alone when I say this. It is just something about the fall colors. It is like you can just walk up and take a bite out of the trees. Like a starburst fruit foliage.

Well, it is just a matter of time until the pumpkins come rolling out of the gardens, and the fall harvests are complete.

The farmers around our town have been chopping corn all week, and the crows are chattering and singing up a storm. I just wish they would hold back on the cow manure until it gets a little colder if you please? And thank you.

Our lady of autumn waits patiently every year until the final buzzer of summer sounds out. The changes are stark, and they are sweet. Such a wonderful event that happens every single year.

I had a lot of fun after we bought our first digital camera back a few years ago when my grandson was born. I think I must have taken about a jazillion pics of the state in different times of the year. I probably took more of fall than the other three seasons put together. I can still remember most of them. Nothing filled up my view finder on my camera quite like the colors of autumn. It seems that I have been able to hold that same feeling for the fall as I did when I was younger.

Thank God for the maples. Autumn just wouldn’t be the same without you.

We have a stretch on our road of about an eighth of a mile or so. This area has maple trees on both sides of the road. During the summer months, it is quite dark when you drive through the area, because the leaves are just so thick that the sun doesn’t have a chance of getting through.

In the fall with the change in the leaves, it’s just quite a sight to ride through it. It’s like going through a brilliant fluorescent tunnel. I was in awe of it every single year. Just one more way that our lady of autumn seems to reach in and pull my soul out of summer. She does it every year, the little devil.

Happy Fall Everyone! May Your Trees Be Merry And Bright?

09 18 11 Three Days Left

I’m sitting here this morning, smack dab in the middle of my house, in the laundry room, and my toes are starting to feel a little chilly. Could it be? Is summer winding down already? Is this the start of another long grueling frigid winter season?

Well, let me tell you all, I am not ready for it in the least. I was just starting to get used to wearing tank tops and shorts. I like wearing tank tops and shorts. I like it a lot! I want my tank tops and shorts, no socks please!

Focus.

Deep Breath.

I know, I know. There are some people out there right now hollering, “Move South You Old sockless Billy Goat! Move South!” Believe me, I hear you loud and clear. It seems that every year I think about it more and more.

I have always lived up here in the north east, and I have visited down south. It seems so foreign to me down there. It is flat, and it just doesn’t even seem to be the same country. It’s just so different.

We have lived out here next to the corn fields and woods for a quarter of a century, and it has become part of me. From the sounds of a rooster a mile up the road that used to greet me every morning when I walked the dogs, to the way my hair on the back of my neck stood up when I would hear the packs of coyotes at night while walking the dogs. It has all become who I am. I don’t think that I will ever be able to rid myself of this place I call home. I don’t know that I would ever want to.

Even now that I can not see any of it, for the most part, I know it is there, and it will always be there. I still smell the smells, hear the sounds, and feel the life that this home of ours has continuously breathed into my soul for so many years.

There are a lot of memories from over the years that play a big part, and those memories are mine and ours and this house’s. Our home turned 100 years old back in 2006. You can tell. There isn’t a straight line in the house. I know. After trying to put new wall board up in the kitchen, I can attest to the crooked nature of this old house. I guess that’s what gives it it’s character. The more time and repair and refurnishing that we seemed to put into this house, the more I realized that we will probably never finish fixing it up.

No matter how much time and effort and money and change we put into this old house, it will always remain, “Our House”. I suppose even after we have moved on and past it.

I have driven past my childhood home in Little Falls a few times as an adult. It seems eerily familiar to me. I sat out front of the house one day, and I could see us kids running around the corner of the house, yelling and screaming and just being kids. I could see myself out in the driveway in the winter, shoveling waste deep snow for what seemed like a week and a half straight. I can still see our dog Scruffy making a bee line for the house after rolling in the manure pile up in Stevens’ barn, sorry Mom, but I can still see it. Smile. I could see us playing hide and seek. I could still feel the simple feelings of home. It was my home back then, and somehow, as I sat there in my car, staring at the house, it still felt like my home, thirty five years later. As I sat there, I could still hear the four thirty whistle from the mill down town. It was a wonderfully strange feeling.

Where was I?

Oh yes, the weather. I am thinking about pulling out my sweat pants this morning. I am also thinking about putting socks on.

I am still thinking.

Nope. I just can’t do it! I will hang on to the summery feeling for as long as I can. There are three days left until summer is over, and the fall solstice comes into view. Darn you fall solstice. Darn you! Why can’t we go from summer right into spring?

I always did like the winter when I was a youngstah. I was always out in it, gobbling it up in huge chunks. I loved the winter, and relished the frigid days.

They seem to have held a different feeling for me back then. I can still taste a pinch of that wonderful childhood pie recipe from those edible days of my youth. I can still taste it, and find myself licking my lips. The memories are that good.

Boy my toes are cold.

Focus.

Ok, I am back. I am still in my shorts and tee shirt. Yes, I crumbled under the pressure and put a tee shirt on this morning, instead of a tank top. Phase one complete. Transformational seasonal chilling engaged.

I want my summer back please! Yes, I said, “My Summer.” As far as I am concerned, it is mine. It has always been mine, and will always be mine. You can go and find your own please. This one is all mine. I consider myself a selfish greedy little pig hog when it comes to my summer. Yes, I said, “My” summer. It has always been mine, and no one else’s. If you happen to find some summer for yourself, then great! Good for you! Just leave mine alone!

No, I am just kidding. Of course you can have some of mine.

NOT! Stay back! Mine! Mine! Mine!

Ok, ok, sorry. Lost my head there for a moment.

My summers still live inside me, and I live inside this house. All in the same, and one along with the other.

Don’t ask me to explain that one, because I can’t.  Just accept that I know exactly what I meant.

I truly hope you have all been able to grab hold of as much of this summer as possible. It truly is an amazing time of year, and holds some of the best memories for me, as I am sure it does for you all as well.

Man, my toes are cold. Wicked cold.

The sun is out this morning.

I think I will go sit out on the front steps and warm up my feet in the morning sun for a bit.

Yup, that’s what I am going to do.

You all have a great summer day. Grab hold of it, drink it up, and take it all in. Three summer days left. Three whole days!

Yee- haw.

09 14 11 First Responders Parade

My wife and I were on our way to pick up our Grandson Jack last Saturday, when we came upon a parade in our local town of Waterville. We pulled up to the traffic lights behind a cruiser, and sat there for over an hour, as the parade precession passed by. This was a state wide event from what we heard. It was a tribute parade for fire and rescue personnel from all points of the state. There were a number of floats in the parade as well. Some of them depicted the skyline of New York City before the tragic events of September 11^th.

We sat there through the parade, and as she told me of the different towns that were in the  parade, we cried and laughed and remembered and were grateful. We were grateful that we lived in such a great country and had the chance to call these brave men and women, Americans. We were even more grateful that we too were Americans, and that our son and grandson were Americans.

There is no better country on the face of the earth, and there has never ever been.

Such a selfless act of giving is unmatched except by our military. This wasn’t about the military though. This was about the first responders, and their sacrifice every day.

One thing that really struck home with me during the parade was when my wife told me of a little boy standing on the street corner near where we were. He was dressed in full fireman’s gear, right down to the oxygen tank and full faced fireman’s helmet. He even had the boots on. This little fireman stood there for the full amount of time that we were there. He stood there on that street corner, never moving, except to wave at the paraders as they proceeded by. It was a sight to behold, and if I could have, I would have gone over and given him a big old bear hug. He doesn’t know it, but he stole a piece of my heart that day. His father stood behind him the whole time waving an American flag with one hand, and the other was on the little boys shoulder. Such a truly wonderful and inspirationally uplifting sight.

There was a military jet flying over head during the parade, and kept buzzing the areas of the parade. It was an awesome sound hearing the  jet coming in low and fast as it swooped down and around the city.

The parade was loaded with antique fire trucks and emergency vehicles all the way from the county, clear down to Boston. As the trucks and other vehicles rolled by, the sirens were blaring and the bells were ringing. The air horns is what seemed to have the biggest effect on me. I don’t know why, but when they lay on those air horns, something rips through my soul. It seems to send a message of sheer urgency through me. It was truly an amazing display of honor and gave us such a sense of pride.

I remember that dark day ten years ago as if it were yesterday, and I will never forget the waves of emotion that swept through me. Emotions from fear, to anger, to hope and love and gratitude. So many emotions passed through me during those long worrisome days. I truly believe that those days changed me, and changed our country. I just hope that no matter what ever happens to this country, we can remain united as one. We need to. We have to.

Before I get totally side tracked with emotion, I must tell you that this parade that we happened upon, was one of the best events I have ever had the privilege of witnessing. There was so much to it. My wife was writing down the different towns that were involved with the parade, and the list was long. All four corners of the state were, representing their towns and communities for such a wonderful event.

There were men’s and women’s auxiliaries there with many men and women who had given a life of devoted service. Then there was the singing fireman.

This guy was also dressed up in full fireman’s gear, complete with oxygen tank. He had a wireless microphone that was transmitting into a float behind him with a speaker system. He was singing patriotic songs, and really put on quite a show. Truly inspiring.

There were old water pumps and water cannons on small platforms with the old style wagon wheels that were being pushed and pulled by firemen. These units must have weighed a ton, but they pushed the pumps and cannons up over the hill near the top of Upper Main Street. I can’t imagine how they did it, but they did. These guys had to be in pretty good shape. I would have died in the process, and would have had to stop at the top of the hill to get a McDonalds sweet tea to replenish my non boyish figure. Smile. Every hundred yards or so, they would stop, and proceed to demonstrate how the cannons worked, shooting a stream of water high into the air and onto the street in front of them.

I hope to God that none of us ever forget the mindless torture of the people in the towers and on the planes and in the pentagon on that day. The tributes must go on forever, not only for this day in history, but for all of the events that have helped shape this country. From the revolution, to the civil wars, up on through WWI and II, never forgetting Viet Nam, or any other war that this country has sent our bravest into.

I remember that day back in 2001. I remember the feeling of being unsure, and I did not like it. One thing that I was sure of though, was that the sacrifices of the Americans on that day would never be forgotten or overlooked by me, for as long as I live.

As the trucks in the parade rolled by, one by one, I thought of the memories of the faces that were walking away from the towers on that morning after they had collapsed. The faces covered in soot and dust and anguish. As the trucks rolled by, one at a time, I remember the visions of the towers falling. I remember the hole that was left in the sky. The hole will be there forever, but it is now a hole full of hope and pride and courage and fortitude. It is a hole filled with the memories of the past, and the dreams of tomorrow.

God Bless the first responders, the men and women who serve our communities. We would not be who we are without you.

God Bless You All, and may He keep you safe.

09 05 11 I'm What?

     I’m What?

Why, how old do I look? I don’t feel that old. I don’t even know how someone that old is supposed to feel. I am supposed to act like what? I beg your pardon? You’re not seriously telling me that I am , how old? No, I am not! Prove it? Ok then, I’ll just hop up onto the, umm,, I’ll just hop up,  hmmmm, What in hell happened to my hopper? Anyone seen my hopper? Could you lend me a hand please?

A state of mind is a mighty powerful thing, don’t you think? Oh what the hell would you know anyway? It can falsely lead you on, without ever really telling you what’s really going on. By the way, what in hell is going on anyway?

A state of mind can also be a wonderful thing. It can replace all of the negative thinking with a compass pointing due north into the sea of tranquility. As long as your dingy doesn’t have a major leak, you are in for a grand old ride. It can help you age gracefully, if there really is such a thing,Is there?

I don’t feel the age that I am, well, most of the time anyway. I just don’t see how I got this old this fast. Wasn’t it just yesterday, or the day before when I was riding my bike back home from Little League practice? Might as well stop at Dar’s Dairy Bar and get a Monster Shake on the way home, or a  double header ice cream cone smothered in jimmies.

How did I get here so fast, and where did everybody go? They were all here just a second ago.

Where did all my Hot Wheels go? Have you seen my Schwinn Sting Ray bike anywhere? I thought I put it right over there, and where are my new Red Ball Jets sneakers? My mom and dad just bought them for me you know. I outgrew them when? Converse All Stars? Really? Could you please tell me where my G.I. Joe’s are, and my new Tonka dump truck?

Oh just forget it, I think I would rather just go out in the field and climb that apple tree that is right out, huh? Where did the apple tree go? Where is our  old house? Who cut the rope swing out of the tree out front, and where are the play pants that my mom just put the knee patches on? Seen my skateboard? No, I didn’t think so. What good are you anyway?

I don’t live here anymore? We moved away when? Huh? Where to? No way! New Hampshire? And then back to Maine? Really?

I seem to remember sitting in Spanish class in High School. That really did happen, right? I thought so. Then I got married right? Yes I remember, it was just a few days ago. What? How long ago? No way. Really? So that’s how I got here?

Seems to me I had a son crawling around here across the kitchen floor just a few minutes ago. Where in blazes did he go? It’s time for me to give him his bath, right? I mean, please, where did “He” go? I need him to hurry up, the school bus will be here in a couple minutes, and he still needs to learn how to ride his new bike, huh? He is working now? Where? He is? What the,? I didn’t even remember to give him his lunch money! Does he need a ride home? He has his own car too? When did he get his license? He did? Who taught him how to drive? I did? That long ago? What the.?

I seem to remember a tall beautiful girl with dark brown hair and a beautiful smile also. Have you seen her? Oh yeah, she’s right over there, and she hasn’t changed a bit.

Hey! How come she hasn’t changed, and there is a gray haired billy goat staring back at me in the mirror? What’s going on, and who glued this other chin to my face?

Didn’t I used to wear size 36/36 pants just the other day? Who bought me all these size 40/34’s? So I am getting wider, and shorter? How wonderful! You think that’s funny? I think it’s just another sick twisted joke that you all are in on. I know it, I just know it!

And could you please tell me who put the stupid floor so far away from me? What kind of sick demented prank is this? A moveable floor. What will they think of next? Feet that slowly disappear? I can just picture it. Hey wait a second, where in hell did my feet go, and how come there is more hair on  my back than on the top of my head? Who’s brilliant idea was that? Why do I ache everywhere, did I sleepwalk with a gang banger from East L.A.? What is that weird smell? What? It’s me? How long have I smelled like this? Really? Could someone please tell me, is that my dog that’s staring at me? Why is she staring at me anyway? She wants me to give her a what? A treat? I think I need a treat more than she does. This is getting out of hand now people. Cut it out already!

Next thing you’ll be telling me is that I have a grandson or something.  Huh? I have a what? Me? What the? Isn’t my son too young to have kids of his own? He’s how old? What? You’re kidding, right? I suppose he calls me Grampa or some old name like that? He calls me what? Ok, now this is really starting to freak me out.

Boy I would love to  just go out in the driveway and hop into my ’72 Chevelle and just take off and  leave all this, What? Where is my Chevelle? I traded it? When? 1985? For what? Another Chevy? Chevy what? Cavalier? What in hell is a Cavalier, and where is my Chevelle?

I think you are seriously deranged my friend, why I bet if I looked out into the driveway I would see my old, what is that maroon van doing in my driveway? It’s mine? Oh man, that’s a Chevy too? A Chevy  what? Uplander? What in hell is an uplander? this is getting ridiculous. I need a beer. What? I don’t drink beer any more? Fruit juice? Please tell me it isn’t prune juice at least. Phew. Huh? It is prune juice? Now this is getting way outta hand!

What are all these pills? Who takes them all? Me? Oh hell to the no! Do I look like a lab rat to you? I don’t think so! You are out of your mind! I do? Really? For what? At my age? Why, how old am I? Huh? I am how old? This is so very very wrong in so many different ways.

Boy I could use a beer! Oh ya, I forget. Well then, at least let me bum a cigarette off of you, huh? I don’t what?